Parents Patience and Children's Good Behaviour

Bismillah (in the name of God)

   I have been paying close attention to children's behaviour for the last ten years- that's how long I've been a mother. Now, without claiming expertise in the area let me share my most important observation. One that I've had the opportunity to see in my own parenting, my friends' parenting and even I recall from the way I was brought up how this shape the way I am.

   Friends, I firmly believe that children's behaviour is, not only, but greatly shaped by how patient we are with them. And let me be clear that coming to this understanding hasn't, from one day to another, made me a patient mom. In fact, I have lost my cool on my sweet children more often than I'd like to admit. 

   What am I doing to help myself in this aspect? First of all recognize that I need to change and take the steps necessary to keep calm when all else seems to be falling apart. It doesn't require me to be super human but determined to do what's in my best interest and my family's well being and happiness.

   Also, make sure I'm taking good care of my body; that is that I'm drinking enough water, eating wholesome foods, getting proper sleep- not the easiest with a newborn but I do what I can, and if not exercising at least moving. Everyday I intend on trying my best. Some days are great others aren't. I just try to start fresh each day.

And lastly but most importantly, feeding my soul by fulfilling my daily prayers, and raising my hands in supplication to the One who can change my condition. I can't stress enough this last step. I believe most reading this are Muslims but if that's not you raise your hands and ask the creator of life and everything in existence and you will be helped in ways you had not imagined.

   You and I both deserve to enjoy the company of our children. And let's be honest, nobody enjoys misbehaviour, constant meltdowns, disrespect, screaming and so on. You get the gist of what I mean. But our children also deserve our patience and our example in dealing with difficulty, trials and tests. Let's try this and see the results. They might not show right away but in the long term we'll be glad that we made the conscientious effort to be patient with our beloved children.

   

Chemo or Alternative Medicine

Bismillah (In the Name of Allah)

I have so neglected this blog. One good thing that came out of this is that now people who read here know how much I slack at posting and won't expect much activity here. This lets me relax and just do it at a comfortable pace. sigh...

I've been pondering about something insightful to blog about and started a post about simplicity and living a slow-paced life. After working on a draft for a couple of evenings I realized that I still have to find my place in this area; there are things which I dream of doing but don't know yet if I'm ready to undergo what it takes to live more simply than what I do now. As I grow in this area and find my balance I will share. Perhaps, you can grow along with me into a more simple person.

For now my post on simplicity will have to wait...

Something happened today: I learned that a Muslim woman I know has cancer and is undergoing chemotherapy. It made me think of what would I do if I find myself in her situation. Had I nobody in my life I would probably not undergo chemotherapy and try alternative medicine and see if it works. If it did, then I would let people know and encourage them to not resort to chemotherapy and conventional medicine as their first means in fighting this disease. If it didn't I would not be leaving loved ones behind thinking: "Had she only done what doctors told her to."

Having a family, however, I feel this would be selfish of me to do. I feel I'd be following my desires and my ideologies against the procedure that's endorsed by the medical community and putting my life in jeopardy without need.

Of course, I understand that only Allah knows when we're going to meet our death and how that's going to happen and I'm at complete ease with this in my mind, alhamdulillah. What I'd like to have more certainty about is the way I'd deal with a disease of this kind if I happened to be affected by it.

Perhaps, it should be a decision taken by the entire family and not just by the affected person. This is a very sensitive matter that here and there we should contemplate.

What are your thoughts on cancer and the methods out there to treat it?